Our sweet dog Stockton

STOCKTON : May 1997 - Sept 1, 2010

My heart has been heavy for several days now. Knowing that it was Stockton's time to go. Today at 4:20 pm Stockton passed away very peacefully with Dave and I by his side. We snuggled and comforted him as he passed on to the next life. I cannot explain the loss that I feel or the pain in my heart. All I know is that it hurts bad and I pray that I will be able to feel peace eventually. It is hard letting go of such a sweet, loyal, and loving spirit. Stockton was my very first dog and Dave and I picked Stockton to be part of our family right after we got married 13 years ago. He was really our first baby and has been through everything with us. We are going to miss all of his kisses, gentle nudges, playfulness, and unconditional love. The hole in our hearts is very big today. We are choosing to think of him pain free, happy, and youthful, frolicking in a lush meadow with all his doggie friends. In a place where there is plenty of love, sunshine, fresh water, and cool breezes. We love you sweet "bubby". You are forever in our hearts.

Beyond The Rainbow

As much as I loved the life we had and all the times we played,
I was so very tired and knew my time on earth would fade.
I saw a wondrous image then of a place that's trouble-free
Where all of us can meet again to spend eternity.

I saw the most beautiful Rainbow, and on the other side
Were meadows rich and beautiful -- lush and green and wide!
And running through the meadows as far as the eye could see
Were animals of every sort as healthy as could be!
My own tired, failing body was fresh and healed and new
And I wanted to go run with them, but I had something left to do.

I needed to reach out to you, to tell you I'm alright
That this place is truly wonderful, then a bright Glow pierced the night.
'Twas the Glow of many Candles shining bright and strong and bold
And I knew then that it held your love in its brilliant shades of gold.

For although we may not be together in the way we used to be,
We are still connected by a cord no eye can see.
So whenever you need to find me, we're never far apart
If you look beyond the Rainbow and listen with your heart.

cg - 1995

Happy 13th Wedding Anniversary

Dave and I are celebrating 13 years of marriage. Wow I cannot believe I am saying that. Dave and I dated for about 4 1/2 years before that. As I am looking back over all these years I can't help but think of all the miracles in my life. I also am reminded of the amazing person I chose to marry. I can't think of anything more beautiful than being married to my best friend. We have accomplished so much together. Dave and I met at Weber State University. I can still remember the day that he came up to me and asked me to watch his stuff in the union building. I had thought about asking him to watch my stuff while I went to get my lunch, but I thought that would be really weird. We talked forever that day and I think that Dave even missed a few classes. We talked about our degrees and goals and all kinds of things, even marriage. He never did ask me for my phone number so when he left to go to work I thought well it was nice talking to him. Maybe I will see him around campus. After that day I admit I did not think much about him. I was very focused on school and I was going through an identity crisis. I was not really wanting to meet anyone and my heart at that time belonged to somebody else. Apparently when Dave went home he talked to his mother about this amazing girl that he had met. He was on cloud nine. His mom asked him if he asked for my number. Nope! Then began Dave's journey to find me again. He said it was the closest thing he had ever done to stalking. Anyway, I don't think that I saw him for several months. Then one day I was in the union building again and he asked me for my number. He had to coerce me into going on a date with him. The only way I would go out with him was if it was a study date. Man I feel like a nerd. He also talked me into going snowmobiling with him. The rest is history. I am so glad he was so persistent. One of my favorite memories is when he went and read the list of who was accepted into the Radiology Technology program for me. I just couldn't look at the list. I had worked so hard and if I didn't get in I was sure I would throw up. Way to take one for the team honey! I am happy to say that I was accepted into the program and graduated with honors. I also was accepted into the ultrasound program and graduated with honors again. Graduating from college was a very proud moment for me. I knew then that I would always be able to take care of myself no matter what. I was also very grateful that Dave believed in my dreams as much as I did. Dave graduated from Weber with his mechanical engineering degree and later from Utah State University with his MBA. I feel like Dave and I have grown up together. In the fall of 2001 Dave and I decided to take a chance and move to Michigan. We had big dreams and it was time to pursue them. We thought the sky was the limit. One day several years ago Dave's mom called me and asked me if I would like Dave's teddy bear and boyscout shirt. If you know me at all you know that I am a very sentimental person so of course the answer was yes. I practically fell over and chills ran up and down my body when I opened the package. I could not believe it! Dave and I had the same teddy bear! They practically look like twins. The fur is all loved off, the noses are just gobs of glue, and the eyes are scratched. These bears were definitely loved. I guess it is true that "everything that I need to know about life I learned from my teddy bear." I knew at that moment that our love was written in the stars and that we were meant to be together. Our lives parallel so much but I do not have a whole day to dedicate to my blog. The best thing that has come from our love is our two beautiful children. Hayden and Kendal are both miracles and I am so eternally grateful for them. Hayden was born on January 6, 2006. He is the sweetest little boy and I am indeed glad I was chosen to be his mother. Kendal made an emergency entrance into this world 10 weeks early on March 7, 2009. We have no doubt that God was watching over her and her precious life. All of our prayers were answered and everything went right although it was an uphill climb. She is destined for great things in this world I am sure. Even though we have had many bumps in the road we have traveled, I have loved every experience good or bad. I can't imagine a better person to lean on than my wonderful husband. I love being married to Dave and look forward to the many years ahead. I love you Dave more than you will ever know. You are my lobster, my mate for life, walking claw in claw along the ocean floor. Happy Anniversary! :O)

Becoming a Soccer Mom?

This year Hayden showed an interest in soccer so I signed him up for the Kiddie Kickers. I am not sure if this makes me an official soccer mom, but I might be on my way. Hayden's team name is the bumblebees. His first game was today and it was so much fun. I think that all the parents had a good laugh and enjoyed watching all the four and five year olds trying to figure out the game. The focus was on learning basic soccer skills, listening to instruction from the coach, remembering which goal to kick the ball into, and being a good sport. I was so proud of how well Hayden followed directions and went out of his way to make friends with his teammates. He even almost made a goal! Most of the kids ran out of steam after the first half and were focusing on other things besides the game. It was very cute in my opinion. Hayden really liked how everybody cheered for his team and he thought his shin guards were really cool. He said "they are like armor,like what iron man wears!"

A very rough week.

You know those days when you are feeling really down and overwhelmed by the things going on in your life, and if anything else slightly bad happens you might just break? I have been having a lot of those types of days lately. I feel like I am being constantly tested to see what else I am capable of handling. Just when I feel like things are getting under control, one more trial is added to the pile. After my knee surgery last week things were going pretty well until Hayden came down with a bug, then Dave came down with the same bug, and then as expected I came down with the stink'n bug. We had to juggle our schedules constantly and ask for special favors even though we knew it would be an inconvenience. Things are really crazy for Dave at work and he is trying to take care of all of us and do his job. I am unable to bear weight on my right leg so taking care of little people and not being able to drive anywhere is very stressful. It doesn't help when you are in a lot of pain either. At my doctors appointment on Thursday the doctor told me that he thought I might have a blood clot (DVT-deep vein thrombosis) in my leg. Being a vascular sonographer I know how serious that is. You would have thought that he told me that the world was ending. Dave was out in the car watching Kendal and Hayden so I had to go and break the news to him that he would have to take me to yet another appointment to have a Doppler ultrasound. As I am apologizing for adding more stress to his life he tells me "don't worry about it, you are worth it." I don't think I could ask for a better husband. I obviously have not been focusing on the positive. All that I could think about was what am I going to do if I have a blood clot? The chances of it were pretty good. The ultrasound ended up being negative for a DVT but showed a hematoma (thank goodness). I have been feeling the pain of not having family close by to help. Dave and I feel very blessed to have awesome friends to play the part. We have had very generous people bring us meals, babysit our kids, and help us get to the places we need to be. I must also mention the flowers, plants, fruit arrangements, and cards that were sent. I am not even sure they will ever know what a great blessing to us they have been and how good it made us feel. Some of the smallest things can make the world of difference in a persons life. So to all of you who read this that have been such an amazing help. Thank you so much from the bottom of our hearts! I am feeling a lot better about our situation and have pledged to focus on the positive and remember that I am surrounded by so many who care. :O)

Saying goodbye to grandma and grandpa Rackham and having surgery

Having mixed emotions this morning. I always seem to have a heavy heart when I know that our family visitors have to go home. All of us have had such a wonderful and memorable time with grandma and grandpa Rackham. They are leaving today and we are all very sad. We will have many fond memories of our visit to the Detroit zoo, playing UNO attacks, and enjoying our day at Walters lake. Dave and I are very thankful and grateful that we were able to go to the movies and to the Amy Grant and Michael W. Smith concert. We love date nights and it is even better when you know that your babies are well taken care of. It has been so nice having family here again. As always it is hard to say goodbye as we are reminded about what we are missing out on. Hayden and Kendal love their grandparents so much and enjoyed their special company. I am also feeling apprehensive about my knee surgery today. I have been praying that all is going to go well and that there won't be any complications. Hayden and I had a good talk about my "boo-bah" last night and he told me not to worry because he was going to help Daddy take care of me. He has such a sweet and tender heart. I know that he is worried about me. I also know that I can borrow his yellow dog anytime if I need extra support. I am feeling very comforted that Dave is going to be by my side. He has been with me through so many knee surgeries and I am glad he will be there with me today. Looking forward to our next visit with family and having my knee surgery over with. :O)

Day at the Beach

Yesterday we spent an awesome day at Whipple Lake, thanks to my very good friend Becky. The weather was perfect and the water was an awesome temperature. Kendal played in the sand and splashed and floated in the water for the first time. Hayden learned to jump off of the swimming platform and swim with a kick board. I am very proud of him and had a lot of fun watching him conquer some of his fears. He is still working on trusting his life jacket to keep him afloat. Dave and I love the water and wake-boarding and are hoping that one day Hayden and Kendal will too. :O) Here are some fun pictures from our day.

Camping in the Upper Peninsula

This last week Dave and I took the kids camping in the Upper Peninsula. Yes, I said camping! I am sure in the back of your mind you are probably thinking, are those two crazy? We may just be...just a little bit. As you can see by the picture (which I think says it all) Dave and I had our hands full. Forget even trying to get a family photo...not gonna happen! The first night was pretty rough. Neither child wanted to go to sleep. Having a four year old that is extremely curious and a 16 month old that is now walking, and does not want to be restrained, makes for an interesting vacation. Dave and I decided to roll with it. I am happy to say that after a few days things were somewhat better. On our trip we visited the Upper and Lower Tahquamenon Falls as well as Whitefish Point to learn about some famous shipwrecks. All of us enjoyed making s'mores and roasting hot dogs over the fire...yummy! We dipped our toes in the cold Great Lake Superior water and played in the sand. On the way home we visited the Mackinac Lighthouse and admired the Mackinac Bridge from a far. The Upper Peninsula is absolutely beautiful and the Falls are breathtaking. I loved being outdoors and spending time with my adorable little family.